5 Myths About Love That Could Be Hurting Your Relationships

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Dysfunctional relationships are everywhere. It really shouldn’t be surprising with all the distorted depictions of love and relationships we see daily. Whether it’s reality TV or one of our dear but misguided friends, there’s no shortage of unhealthy interactions to witness.

Perhaps one of the problems is with our personal constructs of what love entails. There are many beliefs we adopt as truth, but haven’t taken the time to examine more closely.

Here are a few of the widespread myths that may be holding you back from having more healthy relationships.

1. Love hurts.

This is a dangerous one to believe. As a result, some will endure and defend the worst behavior possible. Be it physical or emotional, blindly believing this untruth can lead to unnecessary and unfortunate drama. Love is supportive, not destructive. Sure, the loss of love hurts, but love itself does not. Real love heals.

2. Jealousy shows passion.

Obviously, no one wants a partner who is completely disinterested in the integrity of the relationship. However, there’s a whole spectrum between jealous rage and a partner who couldn’t care less. A significant other who stays in the danger zone of jealousy is probably more interested in ownership, not passion.

3. Love is sacrifice.

To some extent, this may be true. However, the question is: What are you sacrificing? In a relationship, you may sacrifice some preferences for the sake of compromise and peace. The line is crossed when you start sacrificing your values. Make the distinction between preferences and values. You never have to compromise the truth of who you are — even for love.

4. You’ll know.

There are a few people who will have the “love at first sight” experience. However, just because that initial insight isn’t there doesn’t mean it never will be. There is something to be said for chemistry, but many relationships grow at a slower pace.

Keep in mind that your vision may be temporarily clouded by other circumstances. Misinformation, ridiculous expectations, or past heartbreak taint your perspective. Until those issues are dealt with, your judgment will be off. Sometimes, you just don’t know until you do.

5. Love will complete you.

This has to be the biggest myth of all. A relationship should never be your missing piece, and if you believe it is, there’s something else you need to cultivate as an individual. If your loved one is no longer in your life, where does that leave you?

An ideal, mature relationship involves two whole people coming together. Your partner may complement you, but it isn’t their responsibility to complete you. That’s your job. Remember, if they bring it to you, they can take it away.

The way we navigate life and love is dependent on the narratives we tell ourselves. We often refine our definitions on the experiences we have, but sometimes we get stuck. Make sure that your perspective has been chosen consciously. Otherwise, the myths will continue to direct the quality of relationships you have. Love wisely.

By: Dr. F. Emelia Sam
Source: www.mindbodygreen.com

2013-11-12T12:16:45+00:00

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    Greetings, Beloved! You are upset because you expect something and expectation is your problem. You are expecting something beyond your control, expecting something coming from another person you can't control. Just do you and let karma take care of this dude. You just can't up and not love someone anymore. He's either saying that so as to bounce from the scene (leave) and his responsibilities or he never loved you in the first place and perhaps used you for his own purposes of sexual gratification and you ended up getting pregnant. At either rate, just do you and focus on you - what you desire for you and your child. Think positive! Let go of the situation involving this dude. Start on it TODAY! The dude is selfish and creating karma! Release him! You can't make a person do something that is not in them to do.

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    Q: I know you are an herbalist and I have read your articles on relationships, but I really need to discuss an issue with a conscious person like yourself. I have a friend who is a conscious brother, he made it known that he doesn't want to be in a relationship, claims he's to busy, but he is into having a spiritual sexual relationship(releasing energy he says on a spiritual level). My thought is that in order to connect with someone totally on a sexual level they should be a unit to experience this sacred sexual experience he refers to, otherwise to me it seems a very clever why to have sex without the commitment of being in a relationship. I would really appreciate your thoughts.

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    I engaged in pillow talk which is my norm. It had nothing to do with sex at all, spiritual or otherwise. Just intimate conversation. Whether the sex is meaningless or spiritual, it should not be engaged in while detoxing. But of course folks have free will to do as they please.

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    Q: Started my Full Body Cleanse; I?ve been on it for a week :) Love it! Will this regulate my menstrual cycle? Because I have one every three weeks to the date and I have not received the second one for this month and have not been sexually active. I certainly hope so because having two cycles in one month absolutely drains me! It would be nice to have it once a month again!

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    Also, after your cleanse, make sure you take 6 capsules of the Menstrual Cycle formula and drink one cup of the Female Health tea. This will help to fix your irregular cycles. Irregular cycles (every 3 weeks) denotes your body is not functioning properly and your hormonal system is out of whack. Detoxing will greatly help regulate your cycle.