Good morning world! Yes I’m young fly and free, feeling good and all about it. All about what you ask? This life baby. The Dherbs Get Wit It and Go Lifestyle. I’m seeing the changes and feeling awesome about them. I know its because I’ve learned that its not always about how fast you get to the finish line as long as you get there.
Some may say that’s no way for a “winner” to think but that’s exactly how I’m beating the curse of obesity that has stricken my family for generations. I remember being a kid and hearing my younger brother say “I just don’t want to be fat” he was thin at the time and still is and I was well, fat. Lol. At the time I didn’t realize that he was taking note of something that had completely gone over my head. I knew I wasn’t skinny but I never saw fat as a problem. I realize now of course not that fat is bad, but more so that people, even when you are open and need to hear the truth of your situation… they aren’t going to give it to you and sometimes they may think that you;re happy and fine where you are. Or is that only what we project.
I’m no gullible tree hugging, corner sitting, thumb sucking fat boy who needs you to validate how great he is. And though that sounds like confidence its also a part of the shield that kept me protected and hidden. Away from other peoples opinions and ideals. Being fat had become my security blanket and a dam keeping me from my greatest moments. You see, again, we tend to design our lives in part by what others may want for us or think for us so when you see me on a stage or television show, speaking to a audience of 5000 or even hightailing it from one end of the platform to the other, because I did it with ease it seemingly is the heart of my life goals met. Absolutely not, not so. You want to know one of my dearest dreams since the age of 14? I wanted to be able to cross my leg like a gentleman. Yup, that simple, but never could up until now. I wanted to run without the fear of not being able to move…I’m doing it now, I wanted to walk in a store and not feel the prejudices often felt by the heavy set community or have to bear the comments.
If we could only rally on the steps of our nations capitol like the blacks and the gays for our freedom from the oppressing cheese burger and it Work! That freedom from the bodies we’ve felt captive by for so many years would simply melt away leaving only the brighter better you that you long to nurture. But naaaaw baby, you got to earn every pant and dress size you are willing to do the work to get into and keep. The Willing working warrior is who becomes celebrated however. You have to be willing to do the work that make our heart satisfied and fuels the engine of your dreams. One foot in front of the other, one failing attempt after the other, the lonely and often felt abandonment that comes with shifting your life and trajectory. This triumph that I’m feeling this morning was EARNED and I can’t stop smiling about it. I finally did a ice by side look at where I am now and where I started a few years ago.
I was rapped and filled with ego so I hadn’t any idea the dire straights I was truly intermingled with. I was a ticking time bomb. The consequences of my affair with food was nearly fatal
I am beyond grateful for the help, direction and support I’ve gotten form family, my physicians and friends alike. That push, that energy, the love keeps me looking ahead to what my future will be. Nad guess what, I can now claim a future because I have a Life! Something I want truly experiencing while trapped in a fat suit. Am I out of that suit, yes, and into a new way of thinking. I had to ask myself one day, do you really think losing the weight is going to make life better for you. Hell naw I exclaimed to myself. Nope, thats not the ticket. You have to first find your love for self on the inside. Ugly in is ugly out no matter what they tell you, I often ask folks once they’ve lost the wait, “now what are you going to do about ya stank attitude? Losing the weight is only a part of the plan, the bigger part is letting go and allowing love to be rained on you.
Love looks different for us all of course, but even still we must become decided and substantial in our understating that we are “Enough.
My Triumph: I wanted to do 10 Minutes on the stairs but was advised that it would kill my knees due to the condition they’re already in, I opted for the elliptical and on my first run I did 4 miles + then jumped on the treadmill and burned another 200 calories. I also was able to fit into my hope jeans. Lol. You know that pair of pants that you loved you bought but Could Not fit. Well, I got into mine babayayayayay. :)