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Ask The Herbalist
You have some inner blocks that are holding you back. The problems are recorded in your chakras and thus you should have chakra work performed by a qualified (doesn't mean "certified"), and trusted energy healer. Instead of focusing on keeping your life in balance, focus on what you desire to do only. I really suggest that you read my e-book manuals: "The Money, Wealth, and Prosperity Manual", "The Mental Science Manual", and the new "Discovering Your Life's Higher Purpose" (highly recommended). I can totally relate to what you're saying and experiencing! You're just blocked! You may have some vital information stored in your natal chart as well. You need an inner diagnosis performed. If you order all the tools named above, I will give you the consultation for free so we can nail down the location(s) of the inner blockages. You very well may be blocked at the First, and Third chakras. Fear is stored in the First chakra, just to let you know. You can be helped, Beloved! Stay positive, and focus on your desires. Like I state in the "Mental Science Manual", play in your mind! Live in it and miraculously the things stored in the mind, and constantly played out will manifest.